A British woman whose daughter survived an attempted abortion says that she will “always regret” attempting to kill her daughter.

A doctor told Shannon Skinner to abort her child when she became pregnant with her second child because of complications with the first pregnancy.  The 20-year-old went home and took a handful of abortion drugs and waited for the miscarriage to begin.

“I told myself it wasn’t a baby yet,” Skinner told the Christian Institute.  “I was out of my mind with worry that the abortion pills had affected the baby, but it wasn’t until I saw the 3D scan of my daughter on Christmas Eve that I fell in love with her.  Once I’d seen her face, everything was different.”

However, doctors weren’t done trying to get her to kill her baby.  Doctors told her because she had taken abortion drugs that the baby would likely be deformed and that she should undergo the abortion process at 20 weeks.

“To see your daughter’s face and then be told you can still go through with an abortion…how can you?” Skinner told the London Daily Mail.  “To survive the first abortion, my daughter obviously wanted to be here and I couldn’t go through with a surgical abortion. It didn’t matter to me if she was born healthy or not.”

Skinner says she will have to wait to see if the abortion drugs had any impact on the long term mental health of her daughter Amelia, but she doesn’t care either way.

“Every time I look at her I think: ‘She really shouldn’t be here.’ But now that she is, I wouldn’t have it any other way.”